The source of all frustration

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A client was telling me about an experience they had that left them very frustrated and upset.  I am just finishing up The Three Laws of Performance by Steve Zaffron and Dave Logan (an excellent read, by the way) and since Steve was an old est trainer from back in the day, it reminded me of something Werner Erhard had said about what causes upsets.  It’s basically one of three things: either an undelivered communication, an unmet expectation, or a thwarted intention.  (Turns out, with my client, it was 2 out of the 3!)  So here’s my tip of the week: next time you’re upset, angry, frustrated, etc., stop and ask yourself which one of the three is going on.  Is it something either you or they didn’t say to one another (undelivered communication), was it something you had “thought” they were supposed to do but didn’t (unmet expectation), or was it that they said or did something that prevented you from getting something (thwarted intention)?  And if it’s something other than one of those, let me know!  I’d be curious to see if there are any other categories that I’m missing or have overlooked.  Thanks!

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